Bah Humbug

Ok, I have a problem.

Like a serious Scrooge problem.

It's bad.

Like really bad....

And it's not that I'm dreading Christmas, because I am so excited for it I'm constantly smiling and singing Christmas songs. And it's like the weird kind of smiling when you're out in public and you're like why is that woman over there just smiling at me...? Yep, that's me. Only I'm not smiling at you in particular, just in your general direction.

Just enough to make you run for the hills. No. Big. Deal.

And I LOOOOOVE Christmas Music. I can't get enough of it. Thank the Lord for high school music teachers who ingrained a wide variety of Christmas music into us every year. Plus, I love what we do for Christmas around here! I mean, Zach and me. We've already spent an evening driving around to look at lights. And when we decorate the house, we make this big deal out of it. And family Christmas movies. And the baking. Oh my word. We're pretty much a Norman Rockwell painting. Only alive....

This week, Zach and I will take the kids to visit Santa. And then I'm going with a friend to take all of our kidlets to a museum downtown that is like the embodiment of Christmas.

Our whole weekend is full of Christmas festivities with family!!!!

So you see, I'm excited for Christmas. I adore the celebration part of it!!!

Here is where the whole Grinch thing comes in.

I cannot make myself shop for presents.

I'm serious.

I can't even pretend I want to go fight the crowds or the traffic, or the dry air of the shopping centers that makes me feel like I have strep throat before I'm even half way done with the shopping.

And it's more than that.

I can't even get myself to even shop online!!!!

And me, the resident psychologist, I can't even come up with a diagnose for myself to get to the root of the problem. I am so frustrated. But at the same time, I kind of don't even care... Which makes it even worse. Because somehow I am perfectly Ok with not getting anybody anything until sporadically after Christmas. It's really bizarre.

We have less than a week till Christmas and the only people that are finished on my list are the Teachers in our life. And they are only done because today is the last day of school, and so on the way TO school this morning, I drove through Scooters. For gift cards.

I'm obviously awesome.

I really had great plans for gift giving this year. I thought I would get creative, and different and have fun with it. Brooke gave me several really good ideas, yet I didn't execute a single one. Instead, I waited till the last minute and got them something that Ok, something I would have really wanted. And there is nothing wrong with a Scooters giftcard, don't take that the wrong way. After I picked it up, I was like, Ok, this is the perfect gift. Whew.

Still I had some big ambitions for this year. Shoot.

Now I'm just signing gift cards and checking them off my list.

There is some stuff done for the kidlets. But. not everything.... And don't even get me started on our families. I have no thoughts about it. I refuse to even think through possibilities!!!!!!

And if you're my friend, don't you dare even think about getting me something because trust me, I don't even have the mental capacity to think beyond family!!!!

Oh my gosh. I'm so stressing out now. Which actually might be a good thing. I usually perform much better under pressure, so maybe that's all I need.

Just a little bit of a countdown clock reminding me to get my booty in gear.

Oh, and let's not even talk about Zach. Because that might really send me over the edge. I have no idea. NONE. Well, and he gave me a list but I couldn't even bring myself to read through it because the thought of shopping repulsed me so violently!!!

And it's literally the shopping part of it that makes my skin crawl. There is just something about spending money that seriously turns me off.

Crazy right???? lol.

And I shouldn't have any problem with it!!! Really. I shouldn't. But I am. And I don't know if this is the damage extreme poverty for the last year has left me with or what. But it's kind of Bananas Crazy.

Certifiable if you will.

And I've decided on a New Years Card, so you can forget about getting a Christmas Card from me!!!! My two arch nemesis in life: Christmas Cards and Holiday Shopping.

You're pretty thankful you're not me right now, huh? I mean who can possibly cope with the extreme realities of those devastating issues....

Ok, enough about my make believe problems.

If you are wondering when Endless Magic will be out, because I am starting to get some emails, I am going to give you a tentative date right now..... Well, and it's nothing exact, but I don't want anyone hoping for January 1st... Sorry!!! :)That is just not going to happen....

I hoping for Mid-January!!!

Endless is WELL underway but it won't be live before the middle of January!!!! So sorry.

Also. There is an updated version of Reckless available now. Nothing in the storyline has changed, but I went back with it to my current editor and she took a closer look at it, so it's just more polished. I thought Amazon would send out an email, but they haven't yet!

Finally Nook users, Fearless should be live this week on Should be. It's finally showing up in their search bar, so that's definitely a good sign.

And I think that's it. I better get online and start some shopping and then pray it can get here in time.

Oh man, the depression is already sitting in. Next year, I better hire like a Personal Shopper or something...

I definitely better hire a personal shopper.


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  1. Me me meeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. really really would like update on when endless magic will be out please