Late for an Important Date

Thank you everyone who entered their favorite quotes for the Give-Away! This was like my most favorite thing I have ever done! It was just sooo fun! I will announce the winner tomorrow!

I need at least 24 hours to pray about it.

Just kidding!

:)

Today was Pajama Day at Stella's preschool. She was so excited I can't even tell you. Which, thank the Lord, because I really thought she would look at me and go, Pajama Day? How is that different than any other day for us, Mom?

And I would be like.... Because we're not pretending anymore....?

Yikes!

Today is also Pajama Day for me. Which is not good news since we are not at home today..... We're off doing laundry for the majority of these daylight hours, which wouldn't be so bad.

But later I have to take the kidlets to TWO separate Dr.'s appointments.

And then to dance.

Ok, if there were ever two places I needed to look not.... what's the word.... ugly and disheveled. The Dr.'s office and Dance would be those two places.

I have this theory that you always want to look good at the Dr.'s Office. Even if you've spent the last month of your life in the same sweatpants and without a shower.

(Not that that's ever happened to me or anything.)

When it's time to take those children to their health care professional you better gussy up.

I don't know why.... I should be looking at it more like, if anyone is going to understand the over-tired-sleep-deprived-overwhelmed-crazy-haired-smelling-bad-mom it's going to be the doctor right?

Or they are the ones pushing speed dial for CPS. So....

And then dance. Oh, Lord, dance. But I think it's Ok. They all know I'm crazy by now. I'm not trying to pretend anymore. And I'm pretty sure they were never fooled....

But for good measure, let's label today what it is. An Ugly Day. Hello, world! I'm ugly today and pretty proud of it!

And not in the low-self-esteem ugly, in the my hair desperately needs to be washed and is frizzy and greasy and I didn't bother taking off my make up last night, so their is smudged eyeliner underneath my eyes and I'm lucky I remembered deodorant and my sweatshirt has an actual stain on the boob, and I put it on and saw the stain and decided to still wear the sweatshirt, promising myself I would wash it off later today.... That kind of ugly day.

Geesh.

That was kind of depressing after I typed it all out.

Whatevs.

It is what it is.

Ok, so here is my question today? Do you remember the actual Date you got engaged??? Is that an important enough day to remember the actual date???

I mean, I know it's an important date. But.... Let me explain where this is coming from.

I don't.

I don't remember the exact date I got engaged on was.

I have absolutely no idea even what day of the week it was! (How awful is this....)

Here's what I do know. It was in the spring. And it was at night. And... There was absolutely no planning, or a ring involved, or forethought.

We just decided to get married.

Honestly... I can't even remember what month it was.

How terrible am I?????

If it makes you feel any better, Zach can't remember either.

Anyways, these friends of ours, the guy is making a HUGE deal out of the day. Like he's all I'm doing it on this day because this is her favorite number and this is my favorite number and blah blah blah.

And I'm all, you should do it on 11-11-11!!!! That is awesome! AND. It's on a Friday, so how perfect is that????

But I don't think he's listening to me. He is stone set on their favorite numbers.

Which brings me to my next question, do adults still really have favorite numbers???

I don't. But I don't have a "favorite" of very many things to begin with.

Like, if Zach and I went on one of those game shows for couples, I'm pretty sure he wouldn't get any of the answers right, just because there would be no concrete answer.

"What is your wife's favorite color?"

"Um, well, she wears mostly black, but she really loves dressing the girls in pink, but then again her eyes are green. wait, no if somethings orange or red, or purple, or blue or yellow she usually says she likes those too.... I'm going with.... Brown."

In which, he might be right.

I have no idea.

Anyway, I'm off topic. Engagement is funny. Really, when you're in it, you kind of think of it as the beginning of the end. Right? I mean, I did. Now that I'm engaged, my life is over, singlehood was the highlight of my life and now, what's left to look forward to.....? Kids? Stretch marks? Saggy Boobs? Poverty? PTA meetings? Date night once a month?

You can't imagine your life better than what it is at that exact moment. No responsibility, no commitment. Just freedom.

But. Then. (Hopefully) You get married and realize, being engaged was just the beginning of the... beginning. In fact, it makes me physically cringe to think about going back to Zach and my relationship seven years ago. Ugh. It was just so immature and dysfunctional.

And it wasn't like unhealthy. We were happy back then too. I mean, happy enough to want to get married.

It was just the very beginning of a love that would grow and develop into something deeper and all-consuming. Those short few months, when I saw my future withering into a coma patient struggling for breath on life support and feeding tubes was actually the Terrible Two's of a great and epic life together.

So. It's really hard for me to take this couple completely seriously when they are worried about the date of their engagement.

Out of all of the dates in my life, that one is low on the priority list.

I remember my wedding day. I remember the day each of my children were born. The first time Zach planned a surprise get-away for us as a married couple. Our first wedding anniversary in which I was unexpectedly pregnant. And a million other dates and moments that made our engagement only a catalyst for our future happiness.

I remember the details specifically. And the events leading up to it. Why it was so important that we decide to get married right then. And why I was never going to be the girl that wanted the big surprise, or the expensive ring. I remember how important it was for us that I still leave the country for half of our engagement while I left Zach to help plan the wedding because I wanted to rebuild houses in a Tsunami-stricken Sri Lanka.

My poor Mother.....

But since I haven't left the country since, looking back that was a very important trip in forming who I am today.

I don't think it's good or bad to remember your engagement date, I'm just wondering if others do and if I am the neglectful, awful wife or not! ;)

Do you know what's more important than numbers though? The people that surround you up to that date! I cannot even think a thought about my engagement without thinking of my Daddy.

He was the one who convinced me, er, us to get married. He asked me what I was waiting for and promised me that I would never find a better man than Zach. He was pleased with a short engagement and was so proud to walk me down the aisle.

He died four months later. And I cannot help but believe he knew his time was limited.

Actually, I know he believed that because he would tell me all the time that he was dying.

But even more than my Dad, we had friends that helped get us there. Nathan. For one.

Nate will only claim to be Zach's friend. But really. He's my friend too. Don't let him lie to you! And during college I helped him coach a girl's soccer team. Since, Zach and I were in love but young, we did what every couple in our situation does... well most couples do and that is break up constantly and get back together and then break up again.

What? We dated for four years. It was bound to happen!

Anyways, the last time we got back together, we weren't really calling it that, I was too freaked out and wanted to travel the world for the rest of my life, and so the high school girls were asking me one night, "Hey are you and Zach boyfriend and girlfriend again???" In the way only high schoolers can ask.

And I was all.

Oh no, we're just talking.

And then Nate! Opened his big mouth and told Zach what I said after practice and then Zach called me that night and was all, what do you mean we're not back together. And I was like, fine! We're back together!

And then we got engaged like a month later.

And Nate has taken credit for our wedded bliss ever since.

As he probably should....

And one day soon... Well, ok not too soon. I will get to take credit for another happy union.

She knows who she is.

She's also probably way freaking out right now.

So just kidding!!!!!!!!!!!

But if it happens. I better get a toast at the wedding.

The End.

Rachel

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4 comments:

  1. I remember my engagement day, but only because we got in the biggest fight ever about his not asking THE question lol. But let me explain why first. He found out that he is going to England, and we both knew that we want to be together, which meant: fast marriage. So here I am, full time working, full time school, parent and relatives don't speak English, planning a wedding in 3 month all without a ring. Let's just say, my mom and grandma were on my case so much, that my stress level went through the roof, or more like through the roof and up, up, and away to the moon and I just took it out on him.

    Because with my family being on my case, I started wondering if were even gonna get married... So he asked me THE question the very next day! IDIOT lol! :) *I still love him* It totally made me feel like he only asked because we got into that fight. He swears that he was planning on asking that day anyway.

    MEN!

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  2. I'm lucky if I can remember my anniversary, my own birthday, or even my age. Absolutely no way I could tell you the date I got engaged. I don't even think I can remember the time of year? Wow, that's bad. It seems to me you remember all the important things. BUT, you are right..why does that date have to be important? I think 11-11-11 is cool too, maybe if he had picked something like that I would remember it...lol. Bad memory aside, I can remember what I wore the first time we went out...he on the other hand is lucky if he can remember what I wore five minutes after I walk out of a room.... :)

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  4. "I can't be your boyfriend anymore" were the words that stunned me into silence right before my (now) husband proposed. I punched him and then said yes. We got married 3 months later.

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