Blog Beginning

I said I would never do this, but yet here I am. My first blog.

I can't really say how I got here. I mean practically, I entered the web address into my browser and pushed enter. A few title ideas later, a go ahead from my sister in law and here I am... writing. Writing my first blog entry. I'm not going to lie, I am pretty excited about it.

In fact at this moment, I can't remember why it has taken me so long to jump on the blog-band-wagon. I mean, really though, blogging hasn't been around for that long right? Plus, I'm only 25, it's not like I've watched decades of my life fly by, just waiting for the right moment to sit down and pour out my soul to the known and unknown Internet universe.....

So what has taken me so long, or not so long to begin this blogging adventure? Probably fear. Or probably not fear, something more like anxiety? Or.... what's the word..... Trepidation? No, I was right the first time: Fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of opening up my heart and soul and feelings to the world and facing rejection, humiliation and let's see what else..... um..... jeers and rotten tomato's? Ok, ok, yes, I'm being drastically over dramatic.
The worst that can happen? Nobody reads this. And really, is that so bad?

The whole reason I am writing this..... thing, is to put on paper what is constantly floating around in my half-used, half-functioning, mother-of-two brain. To focus my thoughts and have clearly formed, perfectly articulated sentences for just a moment of my cluttered, run-together day. To have an adult moment, outside of the toddler trauma and baby bouncing, and have a clear, thought out, grown up, insightful, intelligent, thought-provoking, quiet-even, couple of minutes every day for just... me.

Wow. That's a lot to ask for. And realistically, very unrealistic. But maybe, hopefully, God-willing... possible. Maybe. Hopefully.

It's not like I don't have time during the day. Because if I'm honest, which is what this whole thing is about to begin with. I do have time. In between Facebook status updates and rifling through Perez Hilton posts, I do have time. Yes, truthfully, it might take me a couple tries, and all day, much like this first entry has taken. And let's face it, I'm not giving up my celebrity gossip updates, as much as I would like to. But somehow between Stella's morning wake up call at 6:30AM and 11:00PM when I finally find my own way to bed, I will sit down and take time for my thoughts, my slowly deteriorating brain and put down things for me. Not Dora the Explorer, or dirty diapers, but my thoughts. Even if they are about barbies and bouncy chairs, at least they are my thoughts on those all-important issues. My take. My point of view. Just for me.. and you.... and the entire known and unknown Internet universe.

Well that's it. My first blog. And it was everything I had hoped it would be.


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