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So last night I had my last Salad Master Training show. (Do you like how I'm getting right to business?).

My boss Todd couldn't be there, so another guy was helping me that is basically exactly where I'm at. We don't entirely know what we're doing just yet.

And last night was as solo as it's been for me. I mean, I had to do the majority of the talking. The majority of the cooking. The majority of the cleaning. Ok. All of the cleaning.

Have I mentioned yet how sexist the guys I work with are? I'm the woman. I do the cleaning. I'm not joking, that's how it is with them.

Don't get me wrong, they're nice guys. But 100% sexist.

Anyways, that's off topic.

Ok. So, I'm going to admit, I wasn't actually nervous. Well. I didn't think I was nervous. Sure, I had to do an entire presentation on cookware that I only know about 25% of the facts about. But 25% can be enough, this is good stuff and there is an overwhelming amount of information I could share if I knew it and that would probably end up just overwhelming the guests.

Plus, as it so happens, I am super good at BS-ing my way through speeches.

Not that I spout lies and misinformation. But usually, I can work my way through it, so even if in my head I am literally lost and talking in circles, whatever comes out of my mouth sounds confident and clear.

I don't think you can call it a gift. I do think you can call it, years and years and years of practice.

One time, I don't even remember who told me, but somebody told me that people just want an answer. They just want to be told something confidently so they can move on.

Thinking that this made sense, I seriously have developed a super nasty habit of just giving people answers confidently whether they're true or or just a half fact I heard somewhere, sometime from something that I vaguely remember. Sometimes I just totally make stuff up on the spot. Facts, statistics, directions, the time of day. Seriously, it's a sickness.

Although over the last year, I've been trying to remedy myself of unintentional lies. It all started with Kylee informing me how crazy I was to just make stuff up to give people an answer. Ever since, I've been trying to cure the crazy.

Ok, moving on.

Oh, I should disclaimer, I don't make stuff up during Salad Master. It's more like the opposite. I'm constantly remembering a fact here and a fact there and shouting them out at random intervals; just trying to get through the damn thing.

Last night, no exception. One little snag.

I assumed I wasn't nervous. I didn't think I was nervous. I didn't feel nervous.

And then bam. I went to slice the potatoes. First thing on the menu. And what happens?

I slice my finger wiiiiiide open! Like suddenly blood is flying everywhere. There's a strong possibility a huge chunk of my skin is now inside of the potatoes. My finger literally won't stop bleeding. I start sweating. Evan(My helper) takes over while I run to the bathroom, blood dripping everywhere and do my best not to slip into shock, or faint from lack of blood!

It was a disaster. Like instead of a cooking show, more like an ER.

And there my guests sit, looking forward to Rachel's Mashed Potatoes for dinner: Made with a little piece of me. Literally.


Don't worry, we didn't actually feed them skin or blood.

But I did realize that I was nervous. Obviously. Good thing it took cutting my finger in half for me to realize that.

And it's sooo irritating. It's not even the deep cut that kills like a mother every time I accidentally let it touch anything! Oh no. It's the fact that I'm incapacitated just because of a little scratch on the tip of my pointer finger that makes everything take a bazillion times longer.

Such as writing this blog. It's hard to type with only 9 fingers. And if I try to use the gimp finger, it's soooo wrapped up in bandage(It keeps bleeding. I have to keep it covered. It seriously looks like half a cast. Ridiculous....) that I end up pushing like ten different keys.

I don't mean to complain. I just want you to all sit there with me for a minute and imagine my night.

My first solo show.

My first opportunity to do this thing by myself.

And my first chance to show my guests how this thing works.

It slices. It dices. It...... cuts my finger in two!

Dinner and a show. In the worst way possible!

Hopefully tonight will be better. Tonight is my first solo show outside of my house!

I think I'm starting to like this job. Hopefully I'll start making money too, but it's not so bad. I love to cook. And I love Salad Master. And I love sharing the benefits of Salad Master with people.

I just hate the selling part. Asking for money part. I kind of wish I could just give it away.....

I keep telling people I'm a terrible salesman. And do you know what they keep telling me?

No, I think you're a really good salesman.

That worries me. And I'm not sure if it's a compliment or an insult.

Also, it's raining outside! Hallelujah.

It even looks like Fall outside! I cannot wait for Fall! I saw the Autumn M&M's at Walgreen's yesterday and I pretty much couldn't wait to buy them! (I at least have to wait until September. Otherwise it just feels like I'm pretending!)

But I miss cloudy, gloomy, wet weather.

I know, I know, it was only a few months ago that I was saying I miss Sunny, bright, warm weather. But enough is enough.

This is why I love Nebraska. Four Seasons. And I cannot wait for the leaves to change colors and the wind to start blowing!

The new carpet is getting put into the Farm this week. Pretty excited about that. We are two weeks out. And I have six boxes packed. Shoot. I have a ton of work to do.

I guess that's what Rainy Days and Mondays are for. Ahem, I mean Tuesdays.


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