Cloudy With A Chance Of MeatBlogs

This has to be the best time of year.

I mean, with all of the Thunderstorms. Last night, we had a pretty big one. Loud thunder, bright lightening, torrential downpour. All of the good stuff.

I think the tornado sirens even went off in Council Bluffs, but no real twister experience.

I love a good storm.

And even a good tornado.

Maybe it's the influence of growing up in the middle of Tornado Alley or maybe it's because I've seen Twister one too many times, (It's Zach's favorite movie. Like his favorite of all time. He watches it over and over and over. And he has it on DVD, Blue Ray and I'm pretty sure there's a VHS copy at his parents house. Don't judge him.) but I don't have the appropriate fear of natural disasters that I should.

It's ok though because Stella makes up for us all. I believe she even makes up for Zach and Aaron's actual tornado chasing. (And by that I mean, they pretend they're Rusty, AKA Philip Seymour Hoffman from Twister, jump in Aaron's 10 year old Jeep Cherokee and literally chase tornados with no equipment but their AM radio and Iphones. I know it's totally awesome. You're totally jealous right now, aren't you?)

Anyways, Stella calls Thunder, the "Under Monster" and she is terrified. The last storm we had, there was thunder earlier in the evening, like before bedtime and she told me, after screaming in my ear for five minutes straight, that she needed to go downstairs to the living room because there were no windows and that's where she would be safe.

Where do kids come up with this stuff? I mean, the funny thing is, she's kind of right. In times of terror, I think I'll look to Stella for the rational plan of action.

Dang it, it should be me, shouldn't it.

Oh well.

One of my greatest weaknesses, and this is going to sound ridiculous, but it's for real, so don't judge, but seriously, one of the biggest, most important skills I lack is Common Sense.

That's not even a joke. I just don't possess the ability to think commonly.


What I mean is sensically. I don't possess the ability to think sensically. I either don't think. Or don't think enough. Or, I come up with some wacked out, totally unreasonable and impossible scenario or course of action.

Zach on the other hand, is a genius when it comes to common sense. He just does the most logical and obvious thing.

I tell him it's a gift all of the time. I'm always like, you're gifted with common sense. This of course causes him to roll his eyes and make some sarcastic comment on how it's called common sense for a reason and everybody has it and I'm actually missing half a brain, that's my problem.

Lol. Ok, he's always just joking, always. Don't take it personally. In fact, just try to have a serious conversation with him. Go ahead, I dare you.

You won't be able to.

I know this, because I've been trying to have one with him for the last 9 years(That's how long we've been together, not just how long we've been married.).

Anyways, the truth is, he may be right. Like I am a smart person, don't misunderstand me, because I'm smart. So what if I have to keep repeating that to myself, over and over and over. I am smart. Like I'm really smart.

:) That was four times just there, you should hear the conversations I have with myself here when I'm alone!

I don't know if Common Sense makes up half of the brain, but I'm at least missing the portion that it does take up. Ok, maybe I'm not missing the actual brain, but the part that is supposed to contain common sense is actually filled with whatever the opposite of common sense would be.

Like, Uncommon Sense. And Irrationality. And the weirdest, strangest, most off the wall type of sense known to man.

I can't think of any scenarios right now, but I can tell you the exact conversation we have because it never changes.

It goes something like, "What do you think we should do?" I say, knowing my answer, but also knowing that it's better to keep it a secret for now.

Zach gives his response and I am blown away.

"Wow," I say, truly shocked.

"What?" He asks self consciously since I could actually be making fun of him, because we still flirt with each other like we're in junior high.

"That's just really smart." I say, genuinely.

"Rachel. It's just common sense." He replies with a mixture of humility and sarcasm.

"Um, well I wouldn't have figured that out." I say, trying to back up my compliment, but maintaining my truthfulness at the same time.

"Well, you only have half of a brain." And then, I usually hit him, and we're back to the junior high flirtations.

Dang it.


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