Easy Bake Blog

So today I'm sick.

The strep finally made it's way around and decided to attack me. It's awesome, let me tell you.

I haven't thrown up or anything, but there is plenty of sore throat and fever to go around.

And the thing is, the thing that really just makes this ironic: Is just Friday I told two different people that I've never had strep, I don't get strep and "It's a good thing I don't get strep because that would be miserable." To quote myself exactly.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy much? But seriously, twice in one week? That's a little harsh, in my opinion. But here we are. With Strep.

And maybe because I feel miserable, or maybe because it feels as if lately I've been surrounded by thoughts about death, today's topic is actually: DEATH.

(Say that ominously in your head.)

Ok, this probably has everything to do with the fact that this has been a really tough week and now I'm starting the next week out sick. But it seems that there has been a lot of talk about death lately.

To give you an example, last night Zach and I rented 2012. Ok, I know, I should have expected a movie that depicts the end of the world to contain some moments of millions of people perishing in earth shattering catastrophes such as earthquakes, volcano's and tsunamis, BUT let's call it hopeful naivety.

Like how Armageddon was an End-Of-The-World-Scenario, but nobody died. Well, ok Bruce Willis died and don't think I didn't cry my eyes out for that one. But the majority of humanity was saved.

2012, we(As in all of humanity) are not so lucky.

Have you seen it?

Ok, I'm going to play Movie Critic again, and go out on a limb and say that that movie is TERRIBLE.

Did you notice I used all caps? I mean, that's really how bad that movie is.

First of all, is John Cusack worried about his film career? First of all, this gem: 2012 and now: Hot Tub Time Machine? Really?

Second, this whole end of the world scenario is totally unrealistic. I mean, not the actual events. The CGI. It's horrible. And totally cheesy.

Third, the movie gets stuck in this weird cycle of Human-Interest-Piece, Great-Cataclysmic-Catastrophe, and Horribly-Made-Somehow-Ironic-Extremely-Cheesy-Way-Out or if you're in the unfortunate half then you'll die. It loops around this way the entire three hours(That's right, pretty much the longest movie ever made.).

But anyways, you sit there for hours watching as people struggle for survival, terrified of death and of the unknown. They have no hope, except the will to survive. And even that is particularly bleak in this depiction.

I watched the movie, realizing how lucky I am. How blessed I am to not share those same fears. I mean death is kind of non-issue for me. I've got the whole after part figured out. I don't have to fear the unknown... it's actually non unknown.

I read another blog, my friend Miriah's blog, and right now her grandmother is facing the same ominous end as 2012. Ok, not so dramatic, but when it comes down to it we all enter the after life in the same poetic, tragic end. (I hope that doesn't sound heartless, it is exactly the opposite, I promise.)

Whether you are swallowed by the earth in a momentous earthquake(Like the tragedy's in Chili and Haiti) or enter death's door slowly and painfully(Via Cancer.) the end result is the same. You're dead. What's on the other side of the door?

In my personal belief, Cancer is the worst way to go. Worst. Worse than death by lava, or car accident, worse than gun shot or drowning(Actually Drowning is probably my biggest fear so.... maybe not. But for all intensive purposes today it's Cancer.).

You can disagree with me, in fact I'm sure most of you will disagree with me. And that's fine. Death touches us all differently and most definitely is very personal. I'm just saying what's worst for me. And that is Cancer.

We don't need a psycholigist to diagnose this one. I mean, it's pretty obvious why I choose Cancer. I watched my grandmother die from blood cancer, my uncle die from lung cancer, my other uncle suffer from lung cancer, my little brother suffer with cancer and my dad have to go through it twice before it eventually took him. Cancer, if I may be so bold, is a bitch.

But that's not the point. The point is that the suffering may be hard, the suffering may be complete and utter, life-diminishing torture, but in the end it's death. It's always death.

The thing is I'm resigned. Death can't scare me. It has no hold over my life. Even if in the end it's cancer or suffocating(Another terrible way to go).

My biggest fear right now would be for my family. My children. If I could see it coming I would have to set Zach up on EHarmony or something and screen the girls before I go.

Because in reality it's those who are left here who suffer the most. Death is a relatively easy way door to walk through and one that doesn't give the walker much choice.

It is those left behind, fighting, suffering, struggling that bare the weight of this burden.

We know this as a society, actually as the universal population. This is the reason we have funerals; to comfort those left behind in the wake of losing someone so important to us. The dead don't care, they're already gone.

But where would we be without this comfort? This last farewell? This most certain ceremony for our departed?

I don't know. I don't even know where I was going with this. My throat hurts and my head is fuzzy.

But I do know this: death does not have to be scary. Or unknown. It can be quite certain. And in fact, quite hopeful.


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